Confronting My Biases, Episode 2: The Presumptuous And The Officious

If I didn’t find the term offensive, I might have called this post “The Attack of the Karens” (The first love of my life, in high school, was named Karen. She married my best friend. I don’t want to talk about it…). It’s also another Spuds story. Let me state right up front: this is one bias I have no intention of banishing.

We live in a cul-de-sac by a church, its parking lot and a public grade school, with a picnic area, a playground and an athletic field nearby. Spuds needed to attend to his morning toilette, so as I have for the nearly three years we have had the pleasure of his company, I followed my pit bull mix on his leash as he went to his favorite peeing place, on the grass just across the cul-de-sac from our home. My dog was just about to complete the job, whereupon he would quickly return to his perch on our sofa, when we were interrupted by a woman, who walked up to within about 15 feet of us and said, “Sir, dogs upset my animals.”

I had noticed that on this day the church or the school had set up a temporary petting zoo near the picnic tables and by the school playground, about 10 yards from where Spuds and I were. Quite a few young kids and their parents were crowded around a pen that appeared to contain a couple of goats, a lamb or two, and an alpaca.

“Why are you telling me this?” I asked, annoyed at her attitude.

“Well, sir, I don’t want you to bring your dog up to the pen. It will upset my animals.”

I was not in the mood to put up with this, in part because I have long vowed not to.

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“Curmie’s Conjectures”: Curmie Doesn’t Like Being Lied To, Part 2

by Curmie

It would seem that prevarication has supplanted baseball as the national pastime.  Name a politician you’d trust to tell you the truth if a lie would be more convenient.  I can’t, and if there’s one out there, it sure as hell isn’t one of the frontrunners in the next Presidential election.

My most recent post concerned getting lied to by the post office, and their subsequent bewilderment that I didn’t appreciate their mendacity.  It’s not just those with ties to the government, though.  Companies feel the need to get in on the act, too.  So, here’s Part II of my rant.

We’ve been in our current house a little over 22 years.  The garage door opener wasn’t new when we moved in.  A few days ago, the chain snapped.  So I went to the local Lowe’s, checked out the possibilities, came home and discussed the options with my wife, and ordered a new opener online.  So far, so good. 

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Quick Ethics Takes On A Wasted Trip To D.C.

  • I was supposed to testify in an arbitration hearing today. I headed to D.C. through the usual awful traffic, finally arriving at my destination after a 45 minute trek, and was informed that my commentary had been postponed suddenly despite being scheduled months ago, and despite my arranging my schedule around it in what has been a very busy September. This occurred after I stayed up until 2 am prepping for my testimony. I could bill for the wasted 90 minutes this fool’s errand took me, but I won’t; ditto the 14 bucks for parking. There were some messed-up communications from the attorney who retained me, but I should have double-checked that all was still as scheduled, and I didn’t.
  • Walking from the parking garage to where the hearing was scheduled, I counted the number of people or all ages walking along looking at their cell phones compared with those who were not: 28 with, only 6 without! This is a genuine social malady with, I suspect, long-term negative consequences that we haven’t begun to understand or prepare for. It reminded me of “Bowling Alone.”

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“Curmie’s Conjectures”: Curmie Doesn’t Like Being Lied To, Part I

by Curmie

Jack’s posts about his experiences at local CVS, 7-11 and McDonald’s outlets have emboldened me to discuss my own recent dealings with respect to a couple of recent purchases.  I’ve experienced two separate incidents over the past few days.  What they share is not simply that someone failed to provide a service they were obligated to provide, but that they lied about it and showed literally no remorse for having done so.

So… here’s incident #1; more next time.

Although I’m retired from teaching, my university has a provision that <i>emeritus</i> faculty are entitled to an office if one is available, and one is.  Because I’m still doing some academic writing, I’m grateful for the workspace, the use of a computer, access to a printer and scanner, etc.  We’re now back in the building we occupied from the time I came here until the summer of 2020, when we were displaced to across campus while renovations and expansions were happening to our “home.”  (We were told we had to move out by the end of May 2020 or we couldn’t move back in the fall of 2021; we couldn’t move in at all until August of this year, and the building won’t really be ready for at least another few months.  But that’s a rant for another day.)

The problems are two-fold.  First, my new office is less than half as big as the one I moved out of three years ago.  Second, it was designed by an idiot, or, more likely, a committee of idiots.  The desk, made of cheap but heavy material, is far too big for an office of that size.  There are permanently mounted cabinets above the desk, but no place for files.  I could go on.  The biggest annoyance is that the offices on my side of the hallway (the smaller ones, with windows offering a view of the convenience store across the street) got only a single bookcase.  I seriously doubt that whoever decided that has ever as much as met a faculty member in the humanities, let alone listened to one.

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Ethics Hero: 14-Year-Old Connor Halsa

Well, let’s start out today with a hopeful story; I don’t know about you, but I need one.

14-year-old Connor Halsa of Moorhead, Minnesota was fishing with his family on Lake of the Woods when he hooked an Iowa farmer’s lost wallet that had come to rest about 20 feet under the surface of the large ( 85 miles long and 56 miles across at its widest point) lake. The previous summer, Jim Denney’s boat had capsized in rough waters, and when he dried out later, he discovered that his wallet was gone along with the $2,000 vacation money he had stored there.

After Connor discovered the wallet and the cash and had dried it all out, he agreed with his father that the next step was tracking down the money’s owner.The only clue inside the wallet was a faded business card with a phone number belonging to a livestock owner in western Wisconsin. The number led them to Denney at his Mount Ayr, Iowa farm. The astonished farmer tried to give Connor a reward, but he refused, saying that he should not be rewarded for doing what was obviously the right thing.

Isn’t that nice? Well, get over it; now its time to start wallowing in the usual muck….

PS. Connor wearing a T-shirt that appears to honor my dog had nothing to do with his selection as today’s Ethics Hero.

_____________

Source: The Star Tribune

The New York Times Publishes A Feature About Ethics And Doesn’t Mention Ethics Once, Part 2

[Once again, I apologize for the dumb error in Part I, where the Unethical Conduct Score and Jerk Score for #8, “Playing gory video games,“ were both supposed to be zero and I inexplicably had them both as “4.“]

To recap, I am examining the ethical logic—if any— being displayed in each of the 16 sections of the Times piece titled “The Virtues of Being Bad,” rating the combination of unethical conduct described and rationalizing it in a public form from 0 (not unethical at all) to 5 (very unethical) as well as assigning a “jerk score” to each of the authors, writers all, again ranging from zero (not a jerk) to 5 (Jerk-o-rama). Part I covered the first eight; now here is 9-16. Warning: it gets pretty weird from here on…

9. “ I, a responsible parent, feed my kids McDonald’s and other junk food. Not all the time. But I do. And they love it.” Oh, so what? This is the most “unethical” conduct this writer engages in? I don’t believe it. It’s more unethical to accept free publicity in a New York Times feature and do so little to earn it.

Unethical Conduct Score: 0. Jerk Score: 2.

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“No Questions Asked” Ethics

Kwame Anthony Appiah, the long-running most recent occupant of the NYT’s “Ethicist” throne, received what I initially thought was one of the dumbest inquiries ever last week. After thinking about it, I decided that it was a good ethics quiz after all.

A man’s son had his mountain bike stolen, and the father issued a notice that there would be a $500 reward for its return, “No questions asked.” The tale continued,

“To my surprise, I got a response from someone, and we set a time to meet. Then I became worried that I was being set up to be robbed. So I called my son. Next thing I knew there were six hulking 20-somethings tagging along with me in my minivan. At the agreed-upon meeting spot, the guy appeared with my bike in hand. …while I’m looking the bike over, they said, in no uncertain terms, that it was not necessary for me to pay for the bike. The guy looked scared, and I wanted things to end safely, so I peeled off half the stack. “How about $250?” The guy took the money and ran off.” 

The inquirer asked the Ethicist whether he did the right thing, since it was obvious to all present that the guy was the thief. Should the father have instead paid the whole promised amount, or nothing at all?

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An Ethics Puzzle From “The Affair”…

This would normally be an item in a Warm-Up or the equivalent, but I haven’t had time for them lately, so I’m going to let the issue fly solo.

In “The Affair,” the protagonist’s best friend assesses the problems that have befallen him as the result of said affair, and offers him $50,000. The adulterous husband (his wife and the friend has been an inseparable threesome in college) protests, but the friend, who is rich and just became richer (he’s a hedge fund whiz), insists. He has the money, and he won’t miss it, and what are friends for?

A couple years later, the protagonist, who has a best selling second novel and is suddenly rolling in money, fame and opportunities, has an argument with his old friend and benefactor at a party. The freind, insulted at his treatment, says, “You seem to forget you that I gave you $50,000!” He adds, “And you never paid me back!” The author protests, “That was a gift!” His friend responds, “Yeah, well you have the money to pay me back now!”

Thoughts:

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Me, Baseball, And Eddie Bressoud: I Missed An Opportunity To Let Someone Who Had A Positive Influence On My Life Know, And I Botched It. Now It’s Too Late…

Not long before he died, Mickey Mantle, who had spent his baseball playing days as a fearful, bitter, anti-social drunk with low self-esteem, had an epiphany when a man, with tears in his eyes, shook his hand and told him how much Mantle had meant to him growing up. Mantle was astonished that what he had done on the baseball field affected anyone so deeply, and said that from that point on, he no longer felt his life had no meaning or worth.

There are people and subjects that have influenced the course of my life, my interests, choices and beliefs far more than any school I have attended or any pursuit I have engaged in to make money: Presidential history, for which I have Robert Ripley to thank (but that’s another story); theater and performing, for which I credit Mr. Gilbert and Mr. Sullivan; Greek Mythology, a gift from my mother; rules for living, the specialty of my dad; and, last but far from least, baseball and the Boston Red Sox.

Eddie Bressoud died a week ago, at 91. He is primarily responsible for making me a lifetime baseball fan, with all the excitement, entertainment and wisdom that roller-coaster experience has supplied.

In the winter of 1962, I was reading the Herald sports pages and read about the Red Sox trading their much-reviled shortstop, Don Buddin, to the new expansion Colt .45s for Bressoud, who had been their first pick in the expansion draft. I hadn’t followed the Red Sox closely before that, though all of my friends were big baseball fans like most normal kids in Boston, Mass. You know me: I don’t follow crowds, I avoid them. I don’t know whether it was Eddie’s name or what that intrigued me, but I watched Opening Day specifically to see the new guy play.

I learned that he was called “Steady Eddie;” that he had a Masters degree and was a teacher; I saw that he was always in motion on the field, talking to other players, pointing, intense, an obvious field leader. Bressoud got a hit and started a 14-game hitting streak, sucking me in to watching or listening to all those games to see how long he could keep it up. I was hooked: I didn’t miss a game for 8 years.

Bressoud wore #1, and backed up every catcher’s throw to the pitcher with men on base, a fundamental move coaches teach by few major league shortstops continue. Eddie had a Fenway stroke, a strange, chopping, 2/3 swing that was perfect for knocking balls off of or over “the Green Monster” in left. He also had a knack for clutch hits and doing the little things that helped score runs, like moving runners to the next base even when grounding out. Eddie hit safely in the first 20 games in 1964, setting a Red Sox record for a beginning of a season.. When the team was behind in the 9th, which was often in those days,it seemed like he never failed to get on base somehow. 

Bressoud was unusually articulate and smart: he was a teacher in the off-season, and always made it clear that his passion was education. I was the only fan I knew who was so enamored of Bressoud: Carl Yastrzemski was the rising superstar on those bad teams before the Boston miracle pennant of 1967, though the Sox manager and coaches sang Bressoud’s praises for playing the game ‘the right way” and being both intense and productive. My loyalty was a family joke long after Eddie had left the game. All three of his seasons as the regular shortstop were excellent, and he was was named to the All-Star team in 1964. He was the only position player who didn’t get into the game. I was crushed.

The next season, new manager Billy Herman took away Bressoud’s starting job before Spring Training, and then traded him to the Mets, I listened to their games on the radio so I could keep up with how Eddie was doing. He was a valuable part-timer for the Mets for two years, and was acquired by the Cardinals in 1967.  His last MLB appearance was, ironically, against the Red Sox in Fenway Park, when he ran onto the field as a defensive replacement for St. Louis in the 1967 World Series. The Boston fans gave him a nice ovation.

Baseball has given me too much pleasure and perspective to recount in the decades since Eddie retired, and I apply the lessons I have learned from the game regularly in everything I do. I designed a baseball trivia game and launched a company to promote it, leading me to my first marketing job. Baseball has given me lifetime friends, and experiences I will never forget. It allowed me to cope with personable disappointments and failures, and to not to be overly impressed with the occasional success. It taught me much about critical thinking and bias (thank-you, Bill James!), character, leadership, ordering priorities, recognizing corruption, and culture.

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I Don’t Know What To Call This, And I Really Don’t Know What Can Be Done About it, But I Know It’s Bad…

I’ve mentioned this toxic phenomenon before, but yesterday I was in Hell. While walking Spuds and driving I saw 14 pedestrians striding along staring at their phones. Three were walking their dogs, and paying no attention to them. One was pushing a baby carriage.

In contrast, I saw only nine adults who were not staring at their phones.

The phenomenon is one of many that is isolating members of society, crippling social skills, undermining the interaction between strangers and neighbors, and giving social media and remote communication an outsized influence over society and the culture. We paved the way for it with such developments as the Sony Walkman, now, if self-isolation and absorption in public isn’t a social norm, it is rapidly becoming one.

Is the conduct unethical? It is tempting to argue that it hurts no one but the phone screen addict, though that definitely doesn’t apply to those behaving like this while caring for dogs, babies and children (or crossing the street). The counter argument would be Kant’s Universality Principle: would we want a world where everyone walks through the world oblivious to everyone and everything but their phone? Well, that’s what we are on the way to creating.

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