Well, I always wanted to be like Clint; not in this way, perhaps, but I'll take what I can get...
Jordan Gray posted the best of the counter-arguments to my resolution of an iron-fisted couples-only policy imposed on a high school junior whose feckless date left her with two tickets, an unworn dress, and a broken heart.
You almost have me convinced, guys. Maybe tgt is right, and I’m just telling the kids to get off my lawn…
Here is Jordan’s Comment of the Day on the post, “Ethics Quiz: The Case of the Abandoned Prom Date”;
“What makes proms special is that they are couples affairs, not just another dance.”
First, there are plenty of ways to enjoy the prom without being part of a “couple”. I’ve heard of singles going as groups, for example, or even being picked up by an existing couple who are more concerned with having fun than manufactured romance.
Second, this approach strikes me as an excellent way of institutionalizing discrimination against students who—because they are not conventionally pretty, or socially experienced, or confident, or attracted to the opposite sex, or are otherwise ostracized—are already marginalized and thus would have trouble finding a suitable date. It becomes a popularity contest where the aim isn’t to win, but not to lose.
“Now that she doesn’t have a date, however, Amanda wants to destroy what makes the prom memorable and unique by forcing administrators to abandon its couples only requirement for her benefit.”
“How do single people going to the prom impact the enjoyment of other prom-goers? Could you justify this assertion?
“I agree that her appeal to misogyny is a red herring, and that some of the responsibility falls to her date for pulling out at such short notice. (Although, obviously, there may have been extenuating circumstances.) My opinion here is that the rule itself is a poor one, and though I can understand the reluctance of administrators to bend it while it remains in force, it seems that the collective inconvenience to other students of having a single girl attend the prom is far less compelling than the upset to this girl of having her dreams of an over-hyped, one-shot special day suddenly laid to waste. This is an institutional rule, not law, and as such it should not be beyond the pale to bend it in cases of merit.”
Ethics Alarms 
As someone who never attended a prom because I was not pretty, not in a relationship, and not savvy enough to find a male friend who was in a similar situation, I agree with the points that Jordan makes. I would have loved to have had the chance to dress up in a fancy dress and “go to the ball,” but I didn’t, and I feel that I missed a rite of passage as a result. I have heard of many schools with very open proms — some where even same-sex couples were welcome (Imagine that!). Given that the example school was Catholic, I’m certain that the latter demographic type was also not welcome. As a “Cradle Catholic,” I am mortified that they would treat this girl so insensitively. But then again, look at what they’re doing to the nuns these days.
This iw what happens when you put faith over evidence and create a structure where the word of the elite must be protected. We see the latter alot in politics, but it’s at least not considered beyond the pale to challenge such.
Rules, unlike “Laws” are guidlines they are not written in stone and can be adjusted , set aisde or done away with by the organization that creates them. This is the 21st Centruy and once again the Catholic Church is showing that it is living in the 19th. IF that.
I think it’s VERY far-fetched to say that the actions of one school are representative of the Catholic Church- I realize that’s a popular kneejerk reaction from many of my fellow agnostics/athiests/skeptics, but the blame here lies solely with the bureaucratic blowhards that infest nearly every school, public or private, in the country. (Somehow I keep misspelling that as ‘bearaucratic’, which is an insult to bears. Bears would greatly improve most bureaucracies.)
Except that this wasn’t the action of one school — it was a school following Archdiocesan policy, meaning that this is policy for all of the Catholic high schools in that Archdiocese.
I have a difficulty understanding your complaint. The Catholic Church repeatedly follows dogma over ethics or sanity. That’s why Vatican II was such a big deal. It isn’t just the nonreligious that understand this. Heck, that’s the complain of most Catholics about the Catholic Church. You can see it in issues like gay rights and birth control where the majority or super majority of Catholics disagree with the Church’s positions.
This failure to change with the tiems is absolutely representative of the Catholic Church.
As a former Catholic I don’t separate each church or school away from the church as a whole . For me the actions of any school or church reflect on the Roman Catholic church as a whole.
I was a gorgeous, high school sorority snob who never attended a prom. They (the proms) seemed so silly, and we thought then that there was no one “cool enough” to take us. Instead we loaded up my VW bug and headed for a week at Cape May, NJ.
Many years later, my son, age 17, escorted the love of life his to her prom. Surprise! When the photos came through, it was a group of TEN kids, only six of whom were ‘dated.” The rest were all pals who wanted to spend the evening together. They went to dinner as a group, and to the dance as a group, A year earlier, my niece did the same thing.
Most adolescents are self-involved, cruel beings. I am pleased to see that friendship and group soidarity seems to be taking the fore.