Ah, the holidays, Thanksgiving and Christmas! Time to gather together in safe, friendly, warm and loving homes, united with loved ones, family and friends, to eat good food together, laugh and sing together, exchange gifts, good wishes and hope, perchance to worship and pray, but most important of all, to hector the stuffing out of everyone on behalf of the Democrats and Obamacare, because there really is no private, family time, time to give thanks and reflect of better things for our fellow human beings—just one great opportunity to carry the message of Big Brother to the eager, desperate and gullible, because, after all, the holidays are really about Barack Obama and his struggling health care law. Right?
Also..how dare they? Programming an army of Obamaphiles to turn the holidays into an extended infomercial for Obamacare crosses multiple lines, several of which place the stepper into disturbingly familiar totalitarian, collectivist territory, where every citizen is deemed a deputized agent of The One True Authority Over Us All. On BarackObama.com, the faithful Obamabots are given all they need to ruin the holidays, including a helpful “packing list” (to make sure your family has everything they need to enroll in Obamacare), various ways to plot to ambush your loved ones to turn the conversation away from peace, good will and sugar plums to saving the President’s bacon, and talking points, so you can be just as charming and honest as Jay Carney, David Plouffe and Debbie Wasserman Schultz.Naturally, none of this acknowledges the fact that the damn system doesn’t work a lick, because the agreed-upon plan to address the fact that Obamacare is a multilateral botch is
- Pretend it isn’t.
- Blame everyone else.
- Lie, and
Thus, in addition to the irredeemable offensiveness of the Fifth Column At Every Table offensive, it also makes liars out of any patriotic, helpful, foolish Americans who allow themselves to be recruited. Here are some of the snarky answers anyone who interrupts the Thanksgiving blessing with these planted questions is likely to get, along with some well-aimed cranberry sauce in the puss:
“Have you thought about signing up for health insurance on the new marketplace?”
Well, yes, actually; in fact I’ve tried repeatedly, and the website keeps crashing. Now I’m think about becoming a serial killer.
“Would you like to take some time with me to sign up right now?”
If, by “some time,” you mean 24 hours a day for the next three weeks, which is what it will take if you’re lucky—NO.
“When do you plan on signing up?”
When the system allows me to, which means, apparently, never.
“Have you signed up yet?”
Is it Easter already?
Those talking points will also go over well, especially since they are laced through and through with half-truths, misleading statements and outright lies:
“You can find a plan that fits your budget—financial assistance is available for those who qualify.”
…Except for those millions of Americans who are being forced to buy plans that not only don’t fit their budgets, but that bust them wide open.
“You get to choose the plan that’s right for you.”
…”Right for you” meaning what government bureaucrats have decided is right for you, that is.
“All the health insurance plans on the new marketplace provide free preventive care—including routine checkups, vaccinations and screenings.”
…Free meaning that you don’t pay directly for them, but they still cost a lot, and the cost is passed on in the form of higher premuims for everyone else, meaning, of course, that they aren’t “free” at all.
“For your coverage to start January 1, you’ll need to sign up by December 15.”
…Which is probably impossible, given that the webiste won’t be working until well into December, if at all, but hey, it’s not OUR relatives you’re lying to!
The “common misconceptions” talking points are also a hoot, but this is giving me bad indigestion, and it’s not even Thanksgiving week yet. You’ll have to check it out yourself. Thus, because it wasn’t sufficiently offensive the first few times this imperial, tone-deaf Administration has used this routine, you are asked to “make a pledge” to wreck the holidays for anyone so unfortunate to have to spend it with a Obamacare shill. Surely you remember this…?
This government respects no boundaries, and accepts no limits to its intrusiveness, arrogance,and manipulation.
It had better stay out of my dining room, or there will be trouble.
Source: Barack Obama
Graphic: Evan Sklar
36 thoughts on “Making Sure Obamacare Wrecks The Holidays, Too”
I can assure Mr. Obama, without his invitation, words will be spoken about Obamacare at our family gathering this Thanksgiving.
This is a pretty stupid exhortation from him. But hey, lemme rationalize it. At least he isn’t calling upon good citizens to secretly inform on neighbors who disagree with O-care or don’t plan on doing it.
Don’t speak too soon.
Honestly—imagine if Bush gave out instructions on how you could use the holidays as an opportunity to convince relatives that invading Iraq was a good idea. It’s not just Obama–everyone around him is tone-deaf, without sense of appropriate words or forums, and shameless. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything approaching it.
The media would have a field day with that. I don’t wish to go into detail how horribly he’d be vilified as a propagandist of the lowest order.
Hey, as for informing on neighbors, maybe Obama could issue a unilateral decree that people will receive an O-care discount for every disloyal citizen they inform on.
Hey, as for informing on neighbors,
Remember that time he had a website made in case you wanted to report something “fishy”?
I do believe it was regarding healthcare.
Guess I spoke too soon then.
Lemme amend the rationalization:
At least he isn’t
hatefully vilifying people who disagree with him as though they were enemies of the nation….uh…..
At least he isn’t
eliminating people without due process…..er….
At least he isn’t hauling people off to ‘re-education’ centers.
The only way anything even remotely resembling Obamacare would show up at our table this year would be if we were dining on the traditional fare.
But none of us like turkey, so we’re eating something else.
The traditional Democratic Obamacare supporter bird this year is, of course, crow.
I’d submit, that since there appears to be a Turkey shortage, that it would be the most symbolically appropriate animal to eat in regards to a holiday oriented towards Obamacare.
I wouldd consider a relative talking up Obamacare at a holiday mean to be an invaluable service…
It would, after all, let me know what members of my family I should not invite to anything, nor bother speaking to from that moment on.
This appears to be one more thing I can add to my ES&D disk. For those unfamiliar with the expression, “E” is for “Eat” and “D” is for “Die”. The rest I leave to those who have an overwhelming grasp of the intuitively obvious.
“Stuffing”, right? The S stands for “stuffing”…
Well, “stuffing” could be close, considering the the famous phrase, “Take that idea and rectally sequester it” sorta involves the same substance, kinda
I always though the phrase was “eat ‘stuffing’ and die in hell”.
Not just E S & D.
I’d wholly agree then that your statement is logical.
Eat strychnine and die.
Why use a ten letter word when a four letter one will suffice?
One of the rules by which I live my life…
I bet Martin Bashir figures this out, whatever it means!
He probably will, since he seems to deal primarily with loads of it.
You’re killing me today, John.
Actually, my ES&D disk used to be limited to form reply letters I would send in response to snarky letters from opposing counsel, but since I retired, I’ve expanded my horizons.
An Eat **** and Die file. I’m dying here, cracking up at the basic concept. And I’m trying to figure out how I create and use one.
I’ve never had a formal Eat **** & Die Disk, but an old workplace once had a F***-it Bucket. It was full of candy for those times you had to just go to the break room, have some candy, and say… well, you get the idea.
Ah, c’mon! This can’t be real. This is from the Onion, no? Really? It’s not? This is a real website? You’ve got to be kidding me! Big Brother is watching us.
Awww,I got the warm fuzzies. I think I’m gonna puke.
Interesting, considering the other day, I got an email from Moveon.org (You just sign up, and they tell you all their plans, and then sit and wait patiently for you to stop laughing and send them money!) “Our plan is to first collect stories from the millions of Americans who have health insurance today because of Obamacare – and get thosevoices into the media. Then we also need to hold Democrats as well as Republicans accountible when they vote to gut Obamacare and send us back to the bad old days of pre-existing conditions, denials of care, and 48 million uninsured… If we can raise enough money today, we’ll be able to turn the next two weeks into a pro-Obamacare backlash, organizing a wave of events and ads for the Thanksgiving recess with local people who have gotten health insuraance and “give thanks” for Obamacare”
Also, “The media has refused to tell the truth about the millions of young adults, people with pre-existing conditions, and low-income Americans who have health coverage today because of Obamacare” Which made my head hurt. Especially since they citeda California study which declared that 440,000 people had successfully signed up for Medicaid as the proof for this claim.
Also I like the postal services’ latest one! Happy gingerbread house to all, and to all a good night!
Are they asking for stories like this
Regarding the story Texas linked…
“In response, White House press secretary Jay Carney said, “We are certainly sorry as we can be that Jessica is one of the folks that has been affected by this.”
Ha!! At least Carney didn’t lie. I’m sure that they are definitely as sorry as they can possibly be.
No, Sharon – Carney didn’t lie. He was obviously confusing Jessica with Julia – an easy mistake to make, in that he’s really not that bright.
Here’s a copy ‘n’ paste link to Julia: http://l.barackobama.com/truth-team/entry/the-life-of-julia/
Click and drag, paste into a new window and… “Every Day is Christmas in 404Land!!!”
Whaddya know, THAT particular piece of agitprop has outlived its usefulness!
Gosh, but I miss Julia.
Childs, that is. She was a liberal, but an earnest one and a great lady. The more recent Julia was a fictional bitch with her hand out.
Okay…I have never been to that site because I don’t want to see any of that garbage but I just looked and…SERIOUSLY?? There is a place where you can report individuals who are lying about Obama and his policies? And the “Obama Truth Team” encourages people to do this! I knew it was bad…but Jesus!!!!
Really? I didn’t know that was back…
If you would be so kind, link me that… Just @ me on twitter (this name) or whatever method works for you…
Not sure folks have picked up on that…
“If you would be so kind, link me that… Just @ me on twitter (this name) or whatever method works for you…”
I just used the link that Arthur from Maine gave in his comment right below my comment and there is was right on the front page when you scroll down….”Report An Attack”. I can’t believe it!!!!
Is this website real?
If so, I am appalled.
Not only is that website real, it’s out of date. The most recent posts I see on it were Oct 2012. This is the website that was up and running during the last days of the election. This is what people were voting for. Some of them even on purpose.
Dear lying, treacherous, devious, hypocritical, manipulating, control freaks,
(Democrats, that would be you)
If your awesome takeover of the medical industry is supposed to have such awesome effects on America, why are you postponing everything so it’s effects will kick in AFTER the mid term elections?
Gosh, if I knew that my signature legislation was the best thing since the Declaration of Independence, I think I would want the effects to kick in BEFORE the mid-terms, because then my party would SCORE humongously during the elections.
Why not? I mean Obamacare is supposed to be unquestionably awesome right? Why wait? What don’t you want America to know about Obamacare? What possibly would make you want to delay it so much?
Maybe if Demi had spent more time on her husband and less time making stupid videos with Ophra-skank she would still be married.
Just a thought.
Also, what the hell happened to Cameron Diaz’s face?
Joseph Goebbels would be proud of how these bozos have taken over Thanksgiving: “We .. intend a principled transformation in the worldview of our entire society, a revolution of the greatest possible extent that will leave nothing out, changing the life of our nation in every regard …” E S & D Hollywood.