Some might think I’m making this gem by Mrs. Q a Comment of the Day for an ulterior motive. She’s a undisputed star commenter, and she’s been MIA for a more than a month now. This was her most recent comment, but I’m not honoring it as an enticement, though I desperately want to see her unique perception and wit back on Ethics Alarms. This was supposed to be a Comment of the Day a month ago, but stuff happened: it’s my fault.
Commenters come and go, then come back sometimes. I always take it personally, which is foolish, but that’s me. When ever I go back and review essays from a few years back, I am struck and depressed by the voices we have lost. Whither wyogranny? Shelly Stow? Steven Mark Pilling? Extradimensional Cephalopod? There are so many.
I also worry about those who disappear, and often send emails to inquire after their health and welfare. Sometimes the responses are reassuring. Sometimes I get no response. Sometimes I forget to send the note. Most bloggers don’t do this, and I’m not sure it’s rational for me to do it.
Here is Mrs. Q’s Comment of the Day on the post, Monday Ethics Final, 3/8/2021: A Bad Day In The Revolution'(Item #5):
Bill asks if wanting to change sex is healthy. It depends on the person and situation. There is also a difference between wanting to be the other sex and wanting to change it. I wanted to pee like a boy as a young girl. Many girls actually have that experience. That is different from having huge strips of flesh taken off an arm to create a pseudo penis that will never naturally function as a man’s would.
Out of all the people I’ve met who were trans-identified that I’ve known and cared about, only one, in my opinion, seemed truly right in his chosen identity. Of course I’m not the arbiter of who is or isn’t trans but I mention this because it can potentially be healthy if the person is highly realistic about the limitations that come with hormones, surgery, and “cross-dressing.” The other thing that makes a difference in my mind is the person understanding that sex really can’t be changed, only that their appearance to pass is potentially increased to the common citizen.
-Why does sex need to be on our ID? For identification purposes. If I need to know that a murderer is on the loose in my neighborhood, or that an elderly person is lost, it’s good to know the sex.
-The Golden Rule doesn’t require lies. Remember the Emperor of America, Joshua Abraham Norton? His “royal subjects” in San Francisco even called for “His Imperial Majesty” to be freed after he was jailed for vagrancy charges. Citizens humored this guy. Which is fine and apparently he was quite the freedom fighter.
Yet San Francisco citizens went along with the delusions of a mentally unwell man. Did it hurt him? Did it hurt the community? Did it set a kind of precedent for the weirdness that is San Francisco? A place where Harvey Milk and Jim Jones and Nancy Pelosi honed their political black magic? Who knows but I think one can be respectful without having to pretend.
-As far as the aardvark thing, there are a small but growing number of people who not only identify as not only as another sex, or another race, but another species. Or no species at all but want to be robot/human hybrids. It’s called transhumanism and it’s a movement that will keep growing. Surely one day there will be calls for robot rights and being able to have a doctor try to turn your hands into dog paws (someone has already had their hands cut off for this).
Where do we draw the line for the right to destroy our bodies in order to rebuild them in our own medicalized image? Will we one day have to address someone as “His Imperial Majesty” or speak to someone in meows? Probably not. But if I ever move to San Francisco this will be the song I sing:
You say potato and I say potatx
You say Latino and I say Latinx
He/Her, They/Them
Woman, Womxn
Let’s call the whole thing off.
Ethics Alarms 
“Most bloggers don’t do this, and I’m not sure it’s rational for me to do it.”
It’s a community. So yes it’s rational.
Jack,
I liken this blog to a great local restaurant for the mind. The proprietor is a great cook and a great host and knows the regulars well but also treats walk-ins with respect and as if they were regulars in the making.
When a old regular is not so frequently visiting, the proprietor, logically, wants to know why. Is it the food? The service? Is the regular ok? As MW said, like a community.
Solid analogy
Lovely analogy, it’s very fitting. EA is nourishment for the mind and soul.
I think once I sent an email inquiring after Jack when he fell silent for a time. Like it or not, if this site were to fade away, it would leave a gap for a lot of us.
Truth
How fun to pop by and see my words from a while back. As always, thank you Jack.
I’ve been away from EA for a few main reasons, that I’m going to discuss openly, knowing in doing so, I may get the words wrong or may not have the proper energy for following up.
I now have a part-time job that is kind of a dream gig for me while also rebuilding the business we had to close for Covid-19 protocols.
Additionally, I’m working on trying to write the story of how my life has intersected with the George Floyd riots that began literally where I grew up. I have been so heartbroken over seeing my old neighborhood destroyed that it still squeezes at me, yet I believe, this story needs to be told.
Because of this and other factors, I have needed to focus on rebuilding my own peace of mind by being off any news related websites, including this one.
The last thing that has kept me away has been some remarks by Jack that have given me pause.
A post written a while back, featured a tweet by Allison Bailey that was used as an example of how feminists dropped the ball on voting for President Biden. I pointed out in the comment section that using her tweet was erroneous for a few reasons including her not being an American but a barrister in the UK. She has been an advocate for biological women’s rights, and has fought – to her own detriment via threats of violence and job loss – to make sure both gays and women do not suffer from neo-homophobia and misogyny from radical members of the trans/queer networks.
When I pointed this out again in a comment on another post, nothing was corrected.
It also seems erroneous to blame things like Biden becoming president on feminists. Though I don’t identify as one, and certainly find fault with many aspects of feminism, I’m still aware that they are a diverse group of people who don’t all agree, especially, and ironically, on women’s rights.
The same goes with saying something is the fault of the LGBTQ+ community. First off, there is no actual community but elite representatives who found it politically convenient to lump a bunch of people together who don’t have much in common. Gays and those who have body dysmorphia or are straight but call themselves queer for social vanity, have opposite concerns and needs. That nuance should be considered when discussing such issues. And I pointed this out as well.
In other words, I felt there was bias happening that gave me pause on engaging with EA. Especially when I so admire the author of this blog and the wisdom I have received from not only Jack but many of the regular commenters who have challenged and taught me.
However the concerns listed above are just one part and I have no serious resentment here.
I’m trying to reestablish my purpose, values, and priorities after years of reading posts from multiple sites and then reacting to them. After living two decades in Portland, a place that increasingly made me feel constantly antagonistic towards encroaching socialism. My brain is still adjusting to a calmer and more ideologically and socially diverse community. My heart is still mending from seeing my fellow man in a near state of possession by forces of propaganda and mob style brutality in Minneapolis.
Perhaps all this makes me sound weak. That I can’t handle the news or the world as it is. However, I believe my strength lies in the choices I make and the habits I cultivate. Now is the time to make choices that nourish my spirit and make me a more joyful person. This means surrounding myself with words, images, and ideas, that help to foster charity and forgiveness.
I still need ethics! And I need time to practice them with less noise from the internet. I will still peek in from time to time here, I just can’t spend so much time and energy here anymore.
I wish everyone here the best and am so grateful for all I have gained from Ethics Alarms.
Thanks, MQ, input much appreciated as always.
I don’t remember that tweet, or the correction. I might have just dropped the ball, but I may have also concluded that the British feminist’s position was still a valid reflection of the US hypocrisy.
Which it was and is. I train on sexual harassment, but when women overwhelmingly align themselves with a serial harasser for expediency’s sake, don’t see the point. That’s what harassers count on—like Andrew Cuomo.Nor do I buy the “well, there are other important issues” claims. WE were told, with much passion, by #MeToo and #TimesUp, that it WAS the most important thing. Brett Kavanaugh was called a criminal based on a dubious account from high school. Biden’s support from women was disgraceful, and I don’t know why anyone should take complaints about harassment by “men in power” seriously when the same women will put their indignation and high dudgeon in escrow when it’s expedient.
I wish you the best on your efforts, Mrs Q. We were iffy about passing through Minneapolis, a city we’ve visited more than once and loved, while on our upcoming vacation this year because of the potential for trouble, but we’ve now certainly crossed it off our drive-through route. That’s just an inconvenience, though. I can’t imagine seeing the neighborhood I grew up in destroyed.