It was 11 am, and having dropped my wife off for a physical therapy session and skipped breakfast, I decided to indulge my self in a guilty pleasure: a McDonald’s sausage biscuit. Say what you will about Mickey D’s: their sausage biscuits beat Jimmy Dean’s, and don’t tempt me to talk about the 7-11 barely-edible version.
So I waited in the Drive-Thru line at the nearest branch (the one that only occasionally get its orders right), and when I finally reached the speaker, made a quick and simple request: “A hash browns and sausage biscuit, please. That’s all.”
A woman said in an impenetrable accent, “Sorry, no biscuit. Just [????].” I had no clue what she was saying. It sounded like “eh.” “Pardon me? Could you repeat that?,” I asked. “No biscuit. Only [????].” Well, I had already decided to cancel the order, since the whole point was the item that wasn’t available, but as a matter of principle, I was damned if I was going to leave without knowing what the mystery word was.
“I’m sorry,” I said, “But I really can’t understand what you are saying.” With an exasperated tone in her voice—right, this is my fault—she said, as clearly as she apparently could, “No breakfast now, just [????].” Ah-HA! Parallel construction! I used to like solving ciphers and codes:the mystery word had to be “lunch.” It still didn’t sound anything like “lunch”; maybe there was an ‘l” at the start, but the word seemed to rhyme with “eng.” Interestingly, no one-syllable English words rhyme with “eng,” but now I understood.
As I pulled out of line, I had an ethics battle with myself, but arrived at ethics zugswang. As Popeye would say, this was all I could stand(s) ’cause I can’t stand(s) no more. I’ll be patient and empathetic with a (legal) immigrant in a low-level job for whom English is a challenge. However, I am less forgiving of management that places such individuals in jobs requiring communications skills they can’t manage. That makes what should be a stress-free process of simply ordering food needlessly annoying. This is so common, though, especially at fast food restaurants, that I am resigned to it as a feature of modern life, one more example of cultural entropy.
I am not ready, however, to excuse McDonalds for entrusting a customer service job to someone who can’t pronounce the word “lunch.” That’s just too irresponsible, incompetent and disrespectful to the consumer. This was a “duty to confront” and “duty to fix the problem” issue. I was ethically obligated to go inside, ask to speak with the manager, and make that point.
Except, realistically, what good was going to come of such action? The manager would probably nod, mumble, and as I left think, “Boy, what an asshole.” Maybe he couldn’t say “lunch” either. Or, if I asked for his name and promised to complain to the company, maybe he would punish the staffer. But it’s not her fault she was given an assignment she was ill-suited to handle. In my experience, people who can’t pronounce words because of an accent don’t even know they can’t.
There was literally no way I could fix this problem, yet by not even trying, I was allowing it to continue and get worse.
And I didn’t even get my sausage biscuit…
Ethics Alarms 
The 1st time I ran into the language barrier was at Boston University at least fifty years ago.
I was a graduate student at the time making a simple course change and virtually ready to get an interpreter to help me navigate what should have been a simple issue.
I can understand folks being placed into positions by the administratissue as a way of negating part of their tuition, But I would also expect them to have a rudimentary understanding of the english language.
I. Realize? In today’s? Society. That makes me some type of bigot and you’ll have to choose exactly what kind.
Well I can see voice activation is working really well. Just can’t wait for AI to take over everything.
And here I thought you were going to make a Boston accent joke.
At the moment I have builders in my home. Talking to the builder is easy, he came to New Zealand when he was four so I can easily understand him. Trying to talk to the painter so that he can do some extra work of painting the outside of the front and back doors, getting the colour right, and paint the doorstep as well took a lot of effort. I think that coming from Malaysia where English was one of the three languages he knew he maybe he thought he could speak good English so hasn’t tried to improve whereas my neighbours from China are much more easy to understand as English being completely foreign to them they have put in the effort to learn.
Well, at least it didn’t come to this:
Well done. I was thinking exactly that.
jvb
Jack,
I totally agree that management at that location is most likely inept. I can also relate to your noble nature of tilting at windmills. My wife gave me a framed Don Quixote print early on in our relationship. For personal peace of mind however I have come to grips with the fact that God put more horses rear-ends in this world than he did horses, and you can’t fix stupid.
I worked at a McDonald’s the entire time I was in college. I worked the drive-thru and I was good at it. It drove me nuts when someone was put in the ordering booth that was incapable of enunciation. I remember a grumpy girl who was constantly being put back there and her mumbling through the headsets (which are terrible) being filtered through the speakerbox (which is also terrible) resulted in multiple customers having to ask what she said.
Anyone who has spent any time in a drive-thru knows that background noise – not just in the restaurant but car radios, kids screaming, dogs barking, sirens blaring, loud engines – and the dubious quality of the equipment already make hearing difficult. Get a few menu items that sound the same, such as “Fry”, “Sprite” or “Pie” and it becomes almost comedic. But a drive-thru worker that never learns to speak loudly and clearly just makes it worse. The people in the delivery booth rely on good communication to make sure the order is correct.
No sausage biscuit for you!
https://www.bing.com/videos/riverview/relatedvideo?q=soup+nazi%27s+episode&mid=D9FEB027529CBD249A2ED9FEB027529CBD249A2E
“Maybe he couldn’t say ‘lunch’ either.”
THAT is piss pants funny.
Thank you! It amused me when it opped into what I laughingly call “my mind.”
I just received a post cataract surgery follow up call. The caller sounded like she was from India or the Philippines and I almost hung up on her thinking she was cold calling me to see if we wanted to sell our house to a developer. Who knows, come to think of it, she may in fact have been off-shore. Crazy. Big business, cataract surgery.
Hey, I once called Quickbooks for help regarding an IRS issue. I could hear roosters in the background. So, there’s that.
Jack,
I called my husband yesterday to vent about this very issue! Except instead of a sausage biscuit, I was being asked significant medical questions, in a call center, as a pre screening for a doctor’s appointment I had today!
My three pre screening questions were as follows:
1. When was my last physical? (He couldn’t fathom that while I’ve been to multiple specialists monthly for years that I’d not had a traditional physical for a few years.)
2. What medications do I take? (I take over a dozen, and there was NO way I was going through them with this guy!)
3. What are my allergies? (I have multiple severe allergies and again wasn’t about to share.)
These three questions weren’t just me asking the caller to repeat himself multiple times, but he asked me to repeat myself a dozen times! And I don’t just speak English passably well. I’m an exceptionally articulate native English speaker. I say that without trying to be boastful.
The phone call took 15+ minutes before I gave up and told him that I would simply come in early today to fill out the paperwork.
His inability to speak English or understand MY English was unforgivable, ESPECIALLY with such an important topic as healthcare. It’s one thing to have him communicating via email or text, where the language barrier isn’t as much of an issue, but this was insanely frustrating as well as potentially dangerous.
I did file a formal complaint with the medical group’s call center, which probably won’t win me any favors but it had to be done. I’m hoping it doesn’t have a negative impact overall because I don’t want the employee punished for being given an impossible task, plus I’ve waited months to see this particular doctor and didn’t want to lose my appointment.
There has to be something we can do to make it possible to give quality and competent service to those patients/customers out there.
Sorry this got up late, CD: I just found it in spam.
CD,
My recommendation is to keep complaining and advocating for what you want and need. Ask questions. Do your own research. Between the government and insurance companies, the push to reduce costs has turned healthcare into a fast-food business model. Essentially push through as many orders as possible in the time available while providing enough quality to avoid malpractice claims loss. In the doctors’ defense, our medical system is the only consumer product in which what we consume and what it costs is almost totally disconnected and unknown at the time of consumption. Yet there is nothing we consume that is as important as medical care to our survival and quality of life. I don’t spend a lot of out-of-pocket for my medical care. Last year my out-of-pocket drug costs were $1,500 and my insurance company paid just over $100k for them. My insurance costs on top of Medicare are obscene. My accountant even questioned why I was spending so much on health insurance. My primary is a concierge doctor. I pay extra for the privilege to see him in a timely manner. I am a firm believer that there is no free lunch, and you frequently get what you pay for.
For the average consumer who sees a physician a few times per year with a minor problem, our current system is adequate. For those of us who require extensive care, the system can frequently be inadequate, frustrating, and sometimes dangerous. My advice? Be reasonable but firm in your demands. Avoid personal attacks. Only complain about things that are important to your care. I have also made a practice of putting my complaints in writing. It adds emphasis, avoids confusion, and tempers your emotional response.
I was going to say something about trying to order breakfast when breakfast time is over (“It was 11 a.m.”) and waiting in line when going inside often is quicker. But, I see the issue is speaking, specifically speaking so as to be understood, so, I won’t even mention that a fast-food breakfast cut-off exists because of the differences in preparing breakfast and dinner meals, nor will I mention the acoustical disadvantage of using drive-through versus in person (pure as gold explanation above).
But I will mention that we should be very grateful for and welcoming to those who come to our country (legally) trying to make a better living for themselves and their families. About 30% of Americans of traditional working age are not gainfully employed, and, to a large extent, it’s immigrants filling the gap. They willingly do the work that many native-borns find to be beneath them.
So, they haven’t mastered English yet? Tolerance, patience, kindness are called for. Those who have been raised in privilege (most lawyers, I would venture) might find it difficult to tolerate substandard service, and true empathy is difficult for everyone (it’s not just a mile in their shoes, it’s days, weeks, years). But, the Golden Rule applies most importantly when there is a large class difference, and even moreso when one party is struggling to make it in an alien world.
As to management, the dilemma is to try to keep things running with whatever help can be found or just shut it down.
Sorry, HJ—just got back to the office.
I assumed someone would mention the cut-off. I don’t use McD’s very often, but I know it has fluctuated between breakfast all day and different cut-offs. One thing that confused me was that I could get the hash browns—which is on the breakfast menu. That went up on the screen.
What??!!?? You don’t monitor the site continuously 24/7? I’m shocked. 😉
Hashbrowns OK, biscuits not. Well, I’d be a little put off by that, too. But, I’d still cut the order taker some slack.
Maybe my comment will show up, maybe not. It’s like Word Press and E A are trying to speak my language, but I don’t understand.
My longer comment, not the one above.
Slightly off topic, but it does fall in the “annoyed at restaurants” category…
Most convenience stores and restaurants have the standard glass double doors to the street; many also have a second set of non-locking doors inside. I’m astounded at how many unlock only one of the outside doors.
I seem to have a frustrating knack for always trying to open the locked door first. I’ve seen little kids bash their heads on the locked door, expecting it to open. Scene ensues. I’ve seen people having to stand waiting in the rain, unable to open the locked door, while larger party exits through the one unlocked door.
What’s up with this? I’ve mentioned it to numerous staff at various locations; it has no effect. I’ve been lied to when requesting the second door be unlocked (“oh, we don’t have the key for that door”, when anyone can flip the two latches on the second door, and I’ve done it myself when ornery enough), to avoid dealing with it. Its especially frustrating at 24-hour places, since that implies it’s been that way since the 80’s.
Maybe there’s a real reason for this, and I’m sure hoping someone can fill me in. Why buy two doors when you refuse to let customers use them both? I’d sure like to know.
I went through the McDonald’s drive thru last night to find out if I could order one of the new Grimace Birthday Shakes. “We can’t do shakes right now”, says the drive-thru person. Sigh.
Today, I went through another McDonald’s drive-thru. Turns out that you can only get the shake if you order a Grimace Birthday Meal (Big Mac or 10-piece nugget with fries). She mumbles the total. The menu board had the nugget meal at about $7 and some change. I got to the window and the total is $10.67. That’s a pricey shake to add to the meal. Especially since it tasted like vanilla shake with purple dye.
First world problem. I know.