What was the Motown legend thinking? This rendition is epically, tragically bad, if not the worst “Star Spangled Banner” ever, certainly the worst within memory by a professional performer. Then, of course, there was this…

But I digress., As you can see from the video at the first game of the new Women’s Professional Baseball League, people were trying to suppress giggles during this musical train wreck. Martha tried to maintain some shred of dignity and talk her way out of near certain enshrinement in the National Anthem Rendition Hall of Shame with such worthies as Robert Goulet and Fergie, telling TMZ,

“Having just celebrated my 85th birthday, I’ve learned a great deal over more than 60 years of performing live. It was an incredible honor to be invited to perform at the inaugural Women’s Professional Baseball League event and to help celebrate such a historic moment for women in sports. I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. The field conditions were wet and windy, and without stage monitors I wasn’t able to hear myself as I normally would. While it wasn’t the performance I had hoped for, I’m grateful to have been there in support of these remarkable athletes and this groundbreaking league.”

Ah. So we now know Martha’s 85, that the field conditions were against her and the tech was inadequate. Uh-uh. Martha can’t sing that difficult song now, and that’s nothing to feel badly about at her age. Why did she agree to do it? Did she really want to have her performance judged by the “It was pretty good for an 85-year-old whose voice is shot” standard? A crucial moment for all ethical performers (including athletes) is to know when to quit. The critical sub category for vocalists of note: Knowing when to stop trying to sing the National Anthem before baseball games.

I will give Martha this compliment, and I mean it sincerely. When the song was falling apart, she never hesitated, never showed her distress, and soldiered on bravely to the end. That’s a pro in action. I have been where Martha was, not on a baseball field but on stages where my moment in the spot light was spinning out of control. You can’t stop the music and you can’t hide. You don’t show your horror, and you do your job—badly, but you finish it.

Then you smile, take your bow, leave, and find a good friend to talk you out of shooting yourself.

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Pointer: JutGory.