Pieces of my head are on the ceiling, thanks to the violent cranial explosion caused by this story, a KABOOM! from across the pond. Usually my head isn’t so sensitive to non-American unethical conduct, but this, as you shall soon see, is special.
Andrew Holland, 51, a Welsh bus driver, was accused of owning an extreme porn video featuring a woman having sex with a tiger. He had been arrested and charged over the video, which he claimed friends gave him as a joke. Holland lost his job, was targeted with hate mail from vigilantes, and he suffered a heart attack that he says was caused by the stress of the case.
Then, after inflicting all of this on Holland, prosecutors looked at the video closely, and, for the first time, with the sound turned on. Oops. That was no tiger—that was a man in a tiger suit. The big clue was when they they heard the randy tiger, in the throes of sexual ecstasy, growl out,
Yes, just like Tony the Tiger, the Frosted Flakes icon, except that in Great Britain they are called “Frosties.”
The Crown Prosecution Service was forced to drop the case, with proper apologies, of course.
Now Holland is part of an effort to reform Great Britain’s overly repressive prostitution laws. I’m not concerned with that here. My head’s contents is on the ceiling because I have a hard time processing the in formation that any prosecutors, anywhere, could be this irresponsible, incompetent, reckless and stupid. To state the obvious…
1. What man in a tiger costume looks like a real tiger to anyone but Mister Magoo?
2. Did anyone watch the video? Never mind the sound. It couldn’t possibly have resembled a tiger having sex with a woman.
3. So Holland was arrested and put through the system without anyone watching the horrible, bestial porn he was accused of possessing?
4. Did he inform a lawyer of the rather important tiger suit detail? If not, why not? If so, why wasn’t he out on the street before he lost his job?
5. Wasn’t anyone curious about how a live tiger happens to have sex with a human being?
6. Tigers, I seem to recall, kill and eat humans when they are in close proximity. They don’t get horny.
7. It should not have been necessary to hear the Tony impressionist say the big cat’s famous catch phrase, although it was the punchline of the joke.
No, I don’t understand this story at all.
I suppose, however, that it provides some solace to those who think the U.S. justice system is a mess. It may not be grrrrrrrrrreat, but it sure is better than this.
Pointer and Source: Res Ipsa Loquitur
Facts: Daily Mirror