More “Do Something!” Climate Change Hysteria!

The New York Times published a serious opinion piece that argues that one good way to save the planet from climate change is to shrink the human race. It’s obvious, isn’t it? Smaller people leave less of a carbon footprint. Brilliant! Thus, writes,

Thomas Samaras, who has been studying height for 40 years and is known in small circles as the Godfather of Shrink Think, a widely unknown philosophy that considers small superior, calculated that if we kept our proportions the same but were just 10 percent shorter in America alone, we would save 87 million tons of food per year (not to mention trillions of gallons of water, quadrillions of B.T.U.s of energy and millions of tons of trash)….Short people don’t just save resources, but as resources become scarcer because of the earth’s growing population and global warming, they may also be best suited for long-term survival (and not just because more of us will be able to jam into spaceships when we are forced off this planet we wrecked)….When you mate with shorter people, you’re potentially saving the planet by shrinking the needs of subsequent generations. Lowering the height minimum for prospective partners on your dating profile is a step toward a greener planet.

You can’t mock people like this enough. They don’t have any practical solutions for preventing what they fear, so instead, in a “We’ve got to DO SOMETHING!” frenzy, they propose nonsense and people actually take them seriously, because they are also in a state of media propaganda-induced terror. I ultimately decided that now was an ideal time for Sidney Wang to make his first Ethics Alarms appearance of 2023, but I was sorely tempted to use this (From “Dr. Cyclops”)…

or even this, from a comic fantasy about how women could finally take over the world…

But in the end, I settled on Sidney, whose simple verdict of “stupid” is the most direct. The latest loony Times  advocacy piece is of a genre becoming routine in the age of The Great Stupid, and I’m grateful for them. Nothing so perfectly illustrates the logical and ethical bankruptcy of the climate change hysterics—of which our current President is one—than their resort to impossible, lunatic proposals that will never be attempted, much less executed, even with the One World dictatorship that any genuine effort to curtail carbon emissions and climate change would necessarily require. Let’s see…if we all give up meat and agriculture, buy electric cars (that we don’t have the infrastructure to support), start-eating bugs, never travel, rely entirely on solar and wind energy, stop using airplanes, limit families to 1.4 children, starve the kids we have, give up pets, stop basing our mating choices on things like love and compatibility and instead focus on height, then we might save the planet except it will all be useless if China, India and developing nations don’t adopt the same measures, and even that might not have any effect because all of the projections and climate models are speculative anyway.

Got it.

12 thoughts on “More “Do Something!” Climate Change Hysteria!

  1. Based on the cartoon image presented it does look like there may be one advantage of being only chest tall.

    That’s about all the snark I can muster. Size is far less important than actual numbers so until China, India and a host of other third world nations stop reproducing, the idea of focusing on the mating with the stature challenged is ridiculous

  2. I bet soon the climate change ideologues will have to say their true logical conclusion, that to save Mother Gaia we will need to implement mass genocide. The next best thing to short people is no people! I think in the context of the climate final solution, so to speak, modern ideologues really will have to advocate for a global version of Jonestown. In their view, all human existence is pain, suffering, and indignity. The worst part of which is the harm we cause the environment with our existence. Since modern society is not going to back to being noble savage hunter-gatherers living in harmony with nature, like the Navi from Avatar, more aggressive measures will need to be taken. What is to be done?

  3. Well, that theory is a victory for abortionists. After doing intrauterine studies about the potential height of the child to be born we can determine its probable impact on the environment and terminate the “little person” before he/she becomes a “big person.”

  4. A new Modest Proposal? I’m thinking the author has probably never heard of Swift.

    At 6’2″ and the third shortest in my immediate family of four, with the shortest at 6′, the future does not bode well for us. I think we may need to take matters into our own hands and just do the right thing voluntarily before they come for us. Everyone will have to make sacrifices, some more than others.

    I will have a couple e-vehicles for sale. We couldn’t find one large enough for the 4 of us.

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