Celebrity dust-ups are usually too trivial even for me to get concerned about, but the behavior of pseudo-celebrity Crystal Hefner, Hugh’s gold-digger widow, is truly gobsmacking, and attention must be paid.
Crystal married the wealthy Playboy founder in his dotage after she was a centerfold in the magazine, for love, I’m sure. Now, having become rich herself (estimated worth: $20-30 million)on the profits from Hugh Hefner’s female objectifying enterprises, she is a feminist. Recently she decided to impugn has-been Saturday Night Live alum Jon Lovitz, saying that he had been the “Playboy Mansion’s No. 1 customer.” Lovitz responded that “Any time someone says I’m No. 1, it’s a compliment.” For some reason, the former Mrs. Hefner thought it made sense to get in a war of words with someone a lot quicker on the uptake than she is.
“I think Jon Lovitz is part of the problem,” she told Page Six. “I think many men who came up to that mansion [and] were very sexist and misogynistic are all part of that problem. If I could dismantle that toxic masculinity and patriarchy just a little bit, I will feel happy. It’s very sad.”
The woman married the man who invited everyone to the Playboy mansion! She was at those parties flaunting her sexual assets; she is ethically estopped from wielding the woke patriarchy blather when she owes her status in life to embracing and promoting it.
She targeting Lovitz after a July exchange, when the comic reacted to her Instagram statement that she “regretted” marrying Hugh. “Do you regret the house he bought for you to live in, after his death?” Lovitz responded. “And keeping the money, after you sold it?… And do you regret all he did for you?”
Good questions. Hefner, proving she was fighting above her metaphorical weight class, said, “Jon Lovitz had mentioned to me that Hef had bought something for me or paid for something and that I have no reason to speak because of that. I think his thinking is very outdated. That’s really sad that, just because someone buys you something, it guarantees silence.”
Once a bimbo, always a bimbo.
Well, as Jimmy Durante would say, “I’m glad I got that out: on my x-ray, it showed up as a safety pin!”
This is the last Open Forum before the Most Important Election In The History of Mankind. Make it count!
Jack was wondering if you saw the incident with Kelly Clarkston a few weeks ago where she claims she got the Pretty Woman treatment at some magic shop.
I was thinking about it because you sometimes write about people punching down (Clarkston posted about the incident on her X account). Anyway, I think it might have been a case of two people talking past each other, but since then, the owner is only proven himself to be a jerk. Was wondering if you think Clarkston was in the right to say something.
I don’t know anything about Crystal Hefner except that she was in her mid-twenties when she married the Playboy czar and is now 40. Her comments do seem hypocritical and self-serving but people, even bimbos, do grow up and their views change. More evidence that silence is golden.
Hef invented male toxicity after World War Two. Until she gives her entire estate to some women’s rights group, she needs to keep her mouth shut about male toxicity and the patriarchy. You can’t have your cake and eat it too.
Voting ethics. I’ve decided to not vote for anyone running who is over 70. I suppose that’s one way for me personally to support term limits, but I was actually really surprised at how many people on the ballots running for office on both sides were over 70. I live in a community with more gray haired people than anything else and have seen firsthand and often the cognitive and physical decline that happens to the elderly, often quickly, and without warning. Plus they tend to have short sighted views, often like teenagers. A carefree attitude because they statistically won’t be around long enough to suffer the consequences of their decisions. I can’t decide if it’s fair to automatically cross out anyone over 70 for office (this happens to eliminate both parties for the federal senate seat) or if there’s a better way. If you have another Trump/Harris option where both are leas than ideal, it makes the choice even more difficult.