A Northwestern University Education, 2010

“Ethics in Politics: An evening with Former Governor Rod Blagojevich,” will be presented by Northwestern University at Cahn Auditorium next week for the education and edification of its students and others in the university community.

Future programs under consideration by Northwestern include:

  • Career Development and Image Enhancement: an evening with Lindsay Lohan
  • Civility in the Public Square: an evening with Rep. Alan Grayson
  • Retirement with Dignity: an evening with O.J. Simpson
  • Building Trust: an evening with Bernard Madoff

I am depressed, and am going to bed.

But if you have  similarly edifying programs to suggest, I will pass them along to the Northwestern administration.

11 thoughts on “A Northwestern University Education, 2010

  1. * Networking With Today’s Youth, presented by Roman Polanski

    * The Secrets To A Long Marriage, by James Cameron

    * Life Free Of Drugs, by Leif Garrett

    * Losing With Grace, by Tonya Harding

    * Strength From Within, by Barry Bonds

    * Living Within Your Means, by MC Hammer

    * Drugs, Sex And An Early Death: The Life Of A Musician, by “Weird Al” Yankovic

    • I’m guessing your Cameron idea involved Tiger Woods… but I felt like going easy on him (and so far, his marriage is still together, technically…)

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