Reddit’s OffMyChest forum is promoted as a safe social media site to post confessions and to seek support or advice for very difficult, personal, potentially embarrassing problems. Of course, there is no such thing on the web, and such posts are only as confidential as the forum’s participants are trustworthy.
An 18-year-old poster calling himself Pilot94 unburdened himself about a statutory rape (or two) that he escaped punishment for thanks to some good luck. But the episode obviously still troubled him. He began…
“I’ve never been good at this sort of thing. Never in my life have I fully told the truth to anyone, except my best friend…But there are things I need to say that I’ve never been able to say before. I am purposefully not using a throw away account, I highly doubt anyone I know will find this but if they do, I’m glad you now know… “
He went on to describe his life to date, and how it had begun to spin out of control:
“I basically turned into a drug dealer with my best friend. He took the pills and I sold them. We started to get into trouble with the police. Patrick and I vandalized numerous parks and places around our town. We got caught for that had probation and fines, etc. That didn’t stop the Dynamic Dumbasses though. We picked up charges for shoplifting, under age consumption, speeding, drunk driving, etc. But nobody knew. We were such good liars that we were able to keep it all to ourselves. …We ran from cops all the time and partied, got drunk, got high, and raised hell. I kept dealing drugs and we kept taking them. Somehow we avoided getting charged for that, though we were close multiple times.”
Then came the incident that prompted the post:
“I knew some girls from school (I thought they were 15-16, they ended being 13-14) that I met at a party. One night they called us up and said they were drunk and wanted to have fun. We couldn’t say no. We drove out and picked all 3 of them up. We parked by the neighborhood pool, got in the back of the truck, and started going at it. Everyone had their clothes off, the girls were making out with each other and having sex…After about an hour, we headed back to their house. We were out front when a cop pulled up. Then shit hit the fan. The girls accused us of raping them, getting them drunk and supplying drugs. They revealed their true age to the police…One of the girls was so drunk she had to have her stomach pumped and spend the night in the hospital. [My friend} and I went home with our parents as the police impounded my truck and started a full criminal investigation into what had happened. Apparently all 3 were virgins prior to the night, and only did this because they were drunk. The one with alcohol poisoning also had vaginal tearing, and they performed a rape kit on her. The evidence against us was incredible. I don’t know why we weren’t arrested on the spot…But for some reason, both the lead detective on the case and the chief of police were fired shortly after. We were told we would hear from the new officer in charge of our case, but we never did. I don’t know how or why, but it just disappeared.”
The near disaster prompted a life turnaround, he wrote, that at least so far was a success:
“Needless to say this scared us beyond straight. Going from expecting 10+ years in prison to miraculously being free was incredible. Somehow I straightened my life up and actually graduated with honors from a Top 500 school….I received a full ride Army ROTC scholarship to a prestigious military school to study Russian and International Affairs and eventually receive a commission as an officer. [My friend and I] both have no idea how or why we were given another chance, but we definitely aren’t going to fuck it up. I know there are stories on here about suicide and other heavy subjects, but this is the most honest I’ve ever been in my life, and it feels amazing. Sorry for making it so long!”
So trusting was the author that he later posted a photo of a scholarship he received from Army Reserve Officer Training Corps to Reddit’s military forum. It included his name, and some Reddit users connected the scholarship, the school, the name and the earlier confession.
And alerted the school.
Now he may be kicked out, and perhaps prosecuted. When he asked on the forum why anyone would do this to him, one Reddit member, perhaps the same one who revealed his secret, wrote…
“You ruined a couple of girls’ childhoods. You make it sound like your a good person now and that you have turned over a new leaf but you never once indicated that you felt any remorse for these people you destroyed. I think you far exaggerate to us and yourself how good of a person you are, and how deserving you are of forgiveness.”
Another wrote:
“He considers drugging and raping 3 14 year olds in the back of his pick up “minor”, he has no remorse for the lives he’s hurt, only that he was caught. He is deserving of no forgiveness until he can show that he actually feels remorse.”
Your Ethics Alarms Ethics Quiz Question is this...
Was reporting him to his school based on his post ethical, or unethical?
I was going to let everyone battle this one out without my input initially, but never mind: I’m not certain reporting him is unethical, but I wouldn’t do it.
I wouldn’t do it because I see no net gain to any individual or society, and a net loss, possibly a devastating one, to Pilot94. He may be a manipulative, dangerous sociopath, but if he is, his post fooled me: I see a kid who had a close brush with disaster and used the scare to turn his life around, or at least is in the process of trying.
Statutory rape is a real and serious crime, and I would never minimize it, but if the scenario is as he described it, a jury could well find that he lacked the necessary mens rea for conviction, and a prosecutor might decide not to pursue the matter. Pilot94 was the beneficiary of moral luck, otherwise known as “dodging a bullet,” and the Golden Rule response to such scenarios, as we reflect on the times in college that we might have driven home with just a few too many beers in us, is to have some compassion and understanding, rather than indignant self-righteousness. The true stories of important, great and accomplished individuals throughout history who have taken advantage of such examples of moral luck, escaping the deserved consequences of wrongful deeds and reckless acts, are too numerous to list. One obvious example is the late Senator Ted Kennedy, not one of my favorite statesmen, but undeniably someone who committed a terrible crime, avoided punishment, and made a significant contributions to society as a result. Of course, his crime was far worse, and it would have been over the line for me: if I had discovered smoking gun proof that Kennedy had let Mary Jo die in that car, I would have revealed it no matter where Ted was in his career. But Ted was a Senator, and a girl died.
I am also troubled by the forum. Yes, Pilot94 shouldn’t have trusted the supposed confidentiality of any internet locale for such an explosive admission, but there are other places for confessions where confidentiality is necessary and reliable, though not legally enforceable: Alcoholics Anonymous meetings, for example. I believe that it is good to have safe havens where people can reveal their darkest secrets and seek advice, support and guidance. The internet may never be such a place, but still, this episode has the feel of a cruel betrayal.
My rule, one with some possible exceptions, is that setting out to ruin someone’s life is generally unethical, unless there is more justification for the act than “he has it coming.”
What do you think?
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Facts: Opposing Views, Daily Dot
Ethics Alarms 
It does make me wonder why things were dropped. Was it blind luck, the information falling down a memory hole in the police personnell shakeup? Or did something make the police drop it at the time and he just never became truly aware? As you say, at least based on his post he may have lacked mens rea. It’s possible (as a hypothetical) that the girls got talking about initiating contact and mentioned lying/misrepresenting age, and the police decided that mens rea was absent, and charges ended up not being pursued.
Now, with the wrath of the internet behind it, it’s quite likely the poor fool will be kicked out of school for PR purposes regardless of any legal findings. He may face charges (no double jeopardy if they didn’t get officially brought the first time) as the police face pressure. The media-circus-that-shall-not-be-named has proved that if enough people are just SURE that someone is guilty, charges will be brought even if the original decision was that they could or should not be.
Of course, none of that excuses the absolute stupidity of posting something like that online. I think everyone has had bullet dodges in their life, and I know I would never risk mine coming to anyone’s attention by putting them online, even pseudo-anonymously.
This story set off my BS detectors.
Why?
There are just too many aspects of this whole story where one has to suspend logic.
Firstly, the guy’s confession of his transgressions reads like a teenager’s wank fantasies. (sorry, can’t think of a better term this early).
(Like the details of underage, virginal drunken floozies who call you up and beg you to ravish them)
Right after this happens, the girls immediately cry rape and one of them even has vaginal tearing (because don’t you know, these teen rapists are very well endowed).
The young ladies are also underage, because, there is nothing more disgusting than sexually assaulting kids.
(In case you still don’t get how very BAD this guy is.)
Then you have to believe he somehow got away with all of his crimes.
Like a comment on another page, isn’t it the DA that brings charges? (rather than the C of P and whoever else got fired.)
You have to believe that more then one set of parents is willing to let the underage rape of their daughters go unpunished.
In this day and age of media bonanza?
Seriously doubt that.
He’d supposedly a master criminal and yet, he posts this confession with his real name, ONLINE.
People do all sorts of elaborate phony stories online for kicks.
I’ve seen a few, none more despicable than the phony cancer patient.
Tigers usually don’t change their stripes.
A kid bad enough to do all of the things he’s said he’s done just doesn’t suddenly become an upstanding citizen.
I think he would continue to commit crimes until he got actual prison time.
Getting away with crimes over and over again usually makes a criminal think he is untouchable.
That certificate can easily be made in Photoshop.
You should have seen the one I made for my brother at Christmas time for being the family member who gained the most weight in a year.
The complete story, from start to finish just doesn’t ring true.
I can’t really explain it other then it sets of my BS detectors.
I think women have a built in sort of 6th sense for keeping their children safe and also for detecting their BS.
I’ve mentioned this before.
So maybe it is nothing more than the feeling it gives me when I read it.
Whatever it is, I fell strongly enough that this is a faux story.
Of course, I may be wrong.
And is often the case, the ethics question remains valid whether all the facts are real or not, and you haven’t answered it: was it right to report him, assuming it WAS true?
This is a very true story and that kid is a rapist. I know this for a fact. Nothing fake about it and yes it is right to report it to his school and anyone else he is involved with like that because HE IS A RAPIST!. HE NEEDS TO BE IN PRISON. I know one of those girls and her family personally. It’s luck that this creep made this mistake of posting that award with his name on it because it makes his confession a prime piece of evidence and now it is going to be an open and shut case against him and his friend.
I just wanted to add that the police officers got fired because the kids parents have a lot of money and ties to upper levels. Let’s see them get around this one now. Justice has a way of coming out and the truth hurts. No matter what it is the right thing to do and report this creep because he is in fact a RAPIST and he needs to be put in jail. Why would anyone want that creep to be roaming around free? Do any of you who made comments have a daughter?. Think about those little girls. So what they may have been experimenting and drank a little but he fed them the stuff and that didn’t give him and his friend the right to RAPE them… He’s just not as smart as he thought he was and told off on himself. NOW LETS MAKE SURE HE GOES TO JAIL WHERE HE BELONGS!. If it was my daughter we wouldn’t be worried about putting him in jail, we would be going to his funeral.
How do you know he’s a rapist, as opposed to a statutory rapist? My response was based on the assumption that the story as he told it was true. I the facts as you state them are true, that would change my analysis, but how do you know? Sounds like a he said/she said to me. What the girls now say and what their parents say are matters for the jury to consider.
I guess it helps to know one of those girls and her family personally. You are correct, I am no judge or jury but I know details that you do not (which will be left untold until this case goes to court) Now we have the confession. You can look at this under the fact of those girls ages and a statutory Rapist could very well be held on that charge (when the younger is a willing participant), but when a person is not giving consent they are being RAPED and that crime will not be downgraded just because the victim is under age. I will say look at that (Mans) confession closer and if you really want to analyze it, know that he “claims” those girls called him. He also “claims” they were drunk and in doing so he feels it necessary to almost as if he is trying to justify his actions with some sort of (false) approval for what he was doing to those girls. This makes him feel what he did was not very bad. A RAPIST can rape someone with the assistance of drugs and alcohol thinking they are somehow getting consent as it is easier to commit the crime when the victim is under the influence. WRONG!, RAPE is RAPE when there is no consent. If one of those little girls was so intoxicated that she had alcohol poising and had to get her stomach pumped and stay over night in the hospital, then I doubt anyone would say she was in any condition to give consent. The “man” is a Rapist but we will not try him her on your blog. Let him have his day in court and if he gets off, then at least it will be under the watch of someone who is qualified with the proper authority. Nevertheless, you asked the question of “Ethics”. So no matter what you call it, Rape or Statutory Rape. It is still RAPE and a crime that violated a child’s life is so many ways, and to let it go untold when you are aware of it is not only unethical but shows a lack of good morals as well. Why give him the idea that it is ok just because he got luck for a minute and some corrupt officials tried to cover things up when influenced with money?. What kind of Ethics is that?.
I don’t need the lecture about what is wrong with statutory rape, thanks—I already stated my opinion, which is in line with yours. The question will remain, 1) Did the girls, as he says, initiate the episode? 2) Did he know they were underage? 3) Did they willingly consent? His conduct is criminal even under his own, self-serving description, but it is a lot worse if the condition were as you describe them. I gather from your response that in fact you don’t know whose account is true.
You asked a question that went off track of the initail question and I answered it, so call it a lecture if you want but it is my reply to your question. Read that mans confession and get those answers to the questions you just asked again. They are right there except for the clarity I made in my prior comments. And yes that is “clarity” and although I was not there I justified my knowlegde based on the fact that consent canot be gave while so intoxicated that you have alcohol poisoning and the need to get your stomach pumped.
Baloney. I asked “How do you know he’s a rapist, as opposed to a statutory rapist?” and you lectured me about the fact that statutory rape was bad, which I already stated in the post. Non-responsive.
Again, you are presuming evidence that you don’t have first hand knowledge of. Did they get drunk before or after consent? Before, after or during sex? Since they are minors, they can’t consent legally anyway.
Your initial question here is about “ETHICS” is it not?. Why are you trying to try this case on your blog?. I do infact have knowledge of this that most others do not but like I said THERE WAS NO CONSENT as you just stated even a minor CANNOT GIVE CONSENT. So you have irrelevant questions here asking about that. I’m not here to argue with you but I am posting comments of facts that I am aware of and soon you will be aware of them as well. The truth is the truth and if you do not like what I have to say or if you just want to argue a case as if you are holding court taking the subject here off track of the initial question of “ETHICS” then either do not read what i have to say or just don’t reply to my comments. I know what I am talking about, as many cases you claim to read all day as if you have no job or life then you should be aware of what you are asking or even trying to accomplish here. Leave the trial up to the courts Pal. Your blog is not the place so stick to your question of if it is ethical or not to report this RAPIST based on his confession he made on his own free will.
Who’s “trying it?” Did you read the post? The question was whether, based only on the knowledge in the Reddit post, it was ethical to report him to the school. That’s the basis of the discussion. I’m not pre-judging him as guilty based on facts I have no personal knowledge of—you are.
Apparently you fail to acknowledge the fact that I have mentioned I DO HAVE PERSONAL KNOWLEDGE of information that you and most others that read this blog DO NOT HAVE. I also mentioned that I am no Judge or Jury and we will leave that up to the courts. I happen to give a little of my personal knowledge on this issue only to make those who read what I had to say aware of me not being like most others here who know nothing about this except for what they read online. You have the choice to either accept what I say for truth or not. That is totally up to you. But there is no need to get off track just because I offered some information that you may or may not disagree with. I merely pointed out the fact that this is a very real and true story. This confession is absolutely a real confession. I did that because of the comments of others who seem to think otherwise. So with that said, Answer my question please, Based on my information assuming it is true, Do you think is/was ethical to report this man for his confession to such a heinous crime?. And if there is any misunderstanding here I will repeat myself. I am not here to argue with you or anyone else. I will apologize if you feel I have insulted you or as you said lectured you. That was not my intent. I merely wanted to point out facts that I do know of and explain why I feel my answer to your initial question is proper and justified to say it is ethical to report this and I would even go as far as saying that we have a moral obligation to our peers to report not just this one but any crime that we are aware of.
If you were not there, and you weren’t, you do not have knowledge. And you said, and I quote, “HE IS A RAPIST!” I don’t call that leaving the determination of guilt up to the courts.
I guess you give no weight to this confession he made on his own free will. Whatever fella. There really is no need for you to try to keep this an ongoing ordeal. I’m done, and will not help promote your blog. I merely wanted to give you an answer to your initial question on the ethics of reporting this self confessed rapist as well as give clarity to the reality of this story. Have a good day.
P.S.
You really should learn to stay on track with the subject at hand. Just because I gave facts so people would see that I have more information than others so what I have to say is credible shouldn’t make you feel the need to shift the subject at hand here to something that was not your initial intent for this blog. Had you wanted to make this blog about what you are trying so hard to turn it into then I would have never bothered posting on here because as I said in my prior comments. I am no Judge or Jury and this is not a court of law. This case is in the process of an ongoing investigation. You will not get what you are seeking here.
The point of the post was straightforward. You pronounced an unsubstantiated assertion that what he confessed as an inadvertent, alcohol-fueled, deception induced statutory rape was in fact a forced rape, which is a different crime. You cannot answer my original question, because the hypothetical involved only a reader who knew no more than what the individual wrote. You claim to know the victims. Not the issue at hand. You wasted my time telling me that statutory rape is a serious crime. You could have searched the blog to discover that I have already covered that point. You called the man a rapist, and then wrote that I who never opined about his guilt at all, am “trying the case.”
Your last paragraph is gibberish–I have no idea what you think I am limited to doing here, or what you think the blog’s purpose is. Based on your muddled commentary, I don’t think you do either, and I don’t care. You asked, with great fanfare, a question that was already answered in the post. I said, assuming I believed that the story was as the individual represented it, no, I would not report him, and I explained why. It’s a quiz, which means that I think it involves some gray area.
Your information is interesting to the extent that it confirms he wasn’t making the whole thing up, which I assumed, but does not prove that his account either is or isn’t accurate. If I though he was a serial rapist on the loose, would I report him? Of course. Who wouldn’t? But that wasn’t the post. And if you are not here to make an ethical point and argue its validity, then you in the wrong place. I didn’t go “off track.’ You have an agenda that is unrelated to the post or the topic.
And don’t call me “fella.”
What kind of moron would put this post on the Internet? If you need to confess and gain some kind of redemption, go to your priest, your minister, your psychiatrist. Let them help you find a way to make amends.
When will people learn that once on the Internet you’re there forever? Confession may be good for the soul, but NOT on-line.
As for the asshole who “outed’ him, may he rot in hell.
Briefly read the original post. The whole thing seems “off” to me as if it was intended to arouse emotions.
It seems off to me as well.
Yes, but to what end? The scholarship document was apparently real. The event being discussed was real enough to cause the writer problems. So it’s “off”–what does that change? Does that make it more ethical to report him? Less? What’s the point of writing a fake confession that can get him kicked out of school?
It’s like a strange f%ed up version of a Playboy confession. I think he was acting out some fantasy online and now he’s going to pay the price.
Justice untempered by Mercy is over-rated.
Or maybe I’m just too pragmatic, looking at outcomes.
Can I help the victims here? They’re top priority. Probably not, no. OK, can we salvage the perps, converting liabilities into assets? Yes. That’s not always the case, we’re lucky if someone gets scared straight.
It’s not unethical not to report him, in this case. It may be in others with different circumstances.
I think the whole story is a hoax but then I don’t believe anything I read. To what end? Maybe to see how people would react to someone who admits to having multiple arrests, being a drug dealer, being a great liar, and “going at it” with three naked under-aged girls in the back of a pick up truck…and THEN turns it around in only a year to get a full scholarship in order to fulfill his dreams of a military career?
Your theory makes no sense at all. There’s skepticism, and there’s denial. People do not claim to be unpunished statutory rapists for the fun of it, or if they do, it’s highly unusual. Occam’s Razor applies here.
Maybe to see how people would react to someone who admits to having multiple arrests, being a drug dealer, being a great liar, and “going at it” with three naked under-aged girls in the back of a pick up truck…and THEN turns it around in only a year to get a full scholarship in order to fulfill his dreams of a military career?
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Definitely not outside the realm of possibility.
Start reading about Internet hoaxes that people get up to when they have nothing better to do.
For your information this crime was committed about 3 weeks before school ended. Those police officers were fired because the kids parents have lots of money and ties to higher levels. It was an attempt to cover up. Now he made the mistake and just gave them an open and shut case against him and his friend. I know one of the girls and her family personally and this is a very true story. His version is a little off of course because he feels he is justifying his actions. example saying those girls called him and his friend is a lie. not to mention those girls were not willing participants. He is a RAPIST and needs to be in jail before he does it again.
As for the ethics of tattling:
If this would be a true story I think it would still be unethical to tattle.
But…I can see how it would happen.
You read that, get disgusted and the knee jerk reaction is to make the bad guy pay, because he deserves it.
Knee jerk reactions based on the Internet are rarely well thought out.
A couple clicks of the mouse and you have reported the crime without even thinking about it too hard.
Whats unethical is to allow a now publically know RAPIST roam free like it’s ok or something. What if it was your daughter?. Get real using words like tattling is just flat out stupid!. Where did you take any lessons on ethics?.
I was just reading about this, trying to find a credible news source running the story.
I see I previously missed the description the kid gave of himself:
good-looking, athletic, popular, wealthy, speaks six languages and has a British accent.
Good Lord.
That’s one reason I believe it. I meet people with stories no more remarkable than that all the time. Read the post about the cab driver. I consider that guy’s back story more unusual than the Reddit tale. I read legal cases all day long. The story about the girls? It’s not unbelievable.
The fact that Orprah Winfrey and the New York Daily News could compare Trayvon Martin to Emmet Till the same week and get away with it, THAT I wouldn’t have believed.
As a Christian, I extend forgiveness where it is asked. That predisposes, however, that it is an honest appeal. As has been mentioned, at no time did this young man ask forgiveness in his narrative from anyone or to God.
In fact, his words conjured up the image of a still-wild, profane and self-centered juvenile at heart. He got away with it- somehow- so he’s gone on to better things? Has he? We have only his word for it, essentially. And that’s the word of a self-confessed drug dealer, libertine and rapist of drunken girls who were still essentially children.
Even had he appealed for that forgiveness, it would still not have been enough. The acid test of true repentance for past misdeeds is the willingness to voluntarily pay the penalty for them and to make what personal amends one can in addition. I saw no indication of such willingness from this young man. Therefore, I hold him lacking in any true redemption.
AMEN!…
I also would like to ask that you all excuse my anger I might be showing. Being a parent of two daughters myself does in fact play a role here and has influence on the morals and ethics in my mind. I surely wouldn’t want this to happen again by this man. I see some people here has the question why he posted his confession online (As if that makes it a fake story) Let’s all remember he felt he was anonymous when doing this. Not all criminals are all that smart just because they went to a higher grade of school and graduated with really high grades. This man made a simple mistake and posted a document that gave information exposing his identity. A cloaked confession does not change the fact that a crime was committed. When people are aware of wrong doing and they do nothing about it, then that allows it to possibly continue and also makes the people who are aware of it to be seen as the same as the person who did it. If you condone it then you must think it is ok.
Please excuse my typo’s
Nope. I also don’t excuse your insults and the continued randomly irrelevant arguments either. You’re over your head, and blaming me. Your last comment, with insults and typos, was spammed, and you’re banned.