Chip Johnson, the married mayor of Hernando, Mississippi, sent a photograph of himself naked in the shower to his mistress, who then widely circulated it on the internet after the mayor discarded her like an old sock, or something. (This is the essentially same plot the the British series “Happy Valley” employed last season, except that ex-lover so exposed was a police detective, not a mayor.)
Chip defended himself by explaining that he had sent the shower selfie last year to an adult woman who was fully consenting in the relationship; in other words, this wasn’t a Weiner situation. Now he’s playing the victim, whining that it was “hurtful” to have his trust violated while he was violating his wife’s trust as well as the trust of his constituency, which trusted him not to make an ass of himself and embarrass them by emailing his naughty bits to his mistress. Johnson told the local paper that he was seeking legal advice. Here’s some ethics advice:
Resign. Mayors should, at very least, be reasonably trusted not to have their Johnsons get displayed far and wide. There is no good reason for any mayor’s Johnson to be so displayed. If a mayor’s Johnson, like Mayor Johnson’s Johnson, is so displayed, it is proof positive that said mayor is an irresponsible fool with terrible judgment. Nobody who is an irresponsible fool with terrible judgment should be a mayor. Sure, the ex-mistress’s conduct was cruel and vindictive, but she’s not the mayor.
It’s really quite simple.
He’s toast, and deserves to be.
Let’s call it “The Naked Mayor Principle.”
[ You can review the related Naked Teacher Principle here...]
31 thoughts on “The Naked Mayor Principle?”
Maybe he should move to France. They laugh about these situations and in a day or two, it is forgotten. Downward mobility seems to be his lot here. Maybe he needs to man up anyway.
If France thinks it’s OK, that alone sets off my ethics alarms.
Do you wonder why they laugh about these situations?
Personally, I think I’d prefer his honor’s exposed body part be identified as his penis. When did “Johnson” come into the vernacular? It strikes me a terribly frat boy and unbecoming of this web log.
Well, I take that back in part. It’s an old English term (aren’t they all).
But I still think lately Johnson is favored among morons. My preferred usage is “dick” or “cock” or “prick.”
I only use it when the exhibitionist is named “Johnson.”
There is a renowned comic melodrama called “Too Much Johnson” about a hero named Johnson who gets in trouble because of…you know. Orson Welled made a film of it.
Oh Christ. I didn’t even notice Hizzoner’s name. Touche.
Ah HA! Skimming again, eh?? See what happens?
I’m waiting for The Naked Principal’s Principle. If his name is Johnson, so much the better.
Richard Johnson, that is.
Hope springs eternal.
My husband’s urologist was Richard Finder. I am not making that up.
Yet more evidence of the ‘dumbing down’ of America. I’m not actually referring to this mayor, but to the people who elected him. What would you like to bet they are Trump supporters (pun intended).
Do the men who send “dick pics” realize that those pictures are often judged with a roll of the eyes and then passed around to the recipient’s girlfriends where a good laugh is had by all? Seriously, the only one impressed with the subject of the photograph is the owner to whom the subject is attached.
I’m with you. I’m from Boston, where being without a tie is considered immodest. I can’t conceive of a man doing this, and can’t imagine a woman appreciating it. I would no more send anyone a photo of my external organs than try to fly by leaping off a bridge, paint myself blue and run through the Capitol shouting “Jimmy Kimmel is GOD!” or gouge my eyes out with melon scoops, and never would have at any time in my life, nor could I respect a woman who would tolerate it.
I’m also from Boston – grew up in Scituate. Go Red Sox!
Well Alicia, what about all the boobalicious selfies inflicted upon everyone every day by every tart in the twitterverse. Let’s not limit this to guys exposing themselves. I’d say the ratio is about … who knows how many to one.
Well, to be fair, female breasts have long been considered objects of beauty. Penises, not so much. In fact, not at all.
Between the current Presidential campaign and stuff like this, I am even more certain we are doomed as a culture and a country. World leadership? From where?
Damn. I was waiting for a G&S patter song to complete this. You’ve got an elected official, the words johnson/Johnson, a mistress, and a wife? What’s wrong with you Jack?
Sir William would never lower himself to such vulgar japery.
Oh ye of little faith. You can make a classy patter song about this. I already picture the trio — the mayor, the ex-mistress, and the wife. Everything could be by innuendo and lots of references to morally bankrupt politicians.
All right, I’ll take the challenge under advisement.
Here, Beth: your wish is my command. Based on “There lived a king” from “The Gondoliers”…
There lived a mayor, as I’ve been told,
Who kept a mistress, not too old
And sent her, though his crotch got cold
Some selfies from his shower
Good-humor spread across his face,
To share, with candor and with grace
The beauty of his naughty place
As if it were a flower.
A Mississippi mayor was he
And Weinerizing might not be
As safe for him to send to she
Had he been from Wisconsin.
Had he been from Wisconsin!
He wished all men endowed as he
But ‘twas impossibility
For fate had ruled prospectively
By having named him “Johnson”!
Now, that’s the kind of mayor for me.
He wished all men as hung as he!
All might have had a happy end
Had Johnson not dismissed his “friend”
But dumping lovers often tends
To prompt some adverse action.
And thanks to Johnson’s Johnson shot
(Which he had probably forgot)
His ex sex partner had him caught
Exposed as an attraction.
Admirers were not the point
The issue was his glistening joint
And whether voters should anoint
A mayor with Johnson famous!
A mayor with Johnson famous!
The moral of this story sad:
If Mayor Johnson, who’s a cad
Lets his nude Johnson make us mad
Then he can hardly blame us.
A moral there for every cad!.
Those Johnson selfies end up bad!
Ack! I can’t handle the “glistening joint” reference, but otherwise, well done sir! The chorus lines are my favorite!
Wait—you incite me to write a lyric about “johnsons” and get squeamish???? But thanks…I’m writing two musical legal ethics seminars, so this was a good warm-up…
My husband loves this song, btw!
Oh, it is Gilbert at his best, and profound as well. And GGSS is doing “The Gondoliers”!
You’re putting on a musical legal ethics seminar? And Hillary’s making more per speech than you are?
Can you believe it????